Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
