Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
birth control should be required to get into college
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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