He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
