the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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