I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
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