i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
