You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
i've created a new STD.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
