I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
