i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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