i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize