Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
