my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Holy shit dude........stairs
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
