Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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