As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.