im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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