what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
