people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
even my farts smell like vagina
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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