Texts From Last Night

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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(

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  (267): Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:( http://tfl.nu/yddk
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  (315): View more from New York

  Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?

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  (315): Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets? http://tfl.nu/drj5
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I am the king of creep.

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  (262): I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me". (262): I am the king of creep. http://tfl.nu/3401
  Replies (12) Good night (3248) Bad night (893)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.

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  (847): I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags. http://tfl.nu/hgni
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.

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  (615): I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked. http://tfl.nu/9nla
  Replies (31) Good night (996) Bad night (4460) Order T-Shirt
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.

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  (414): Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after. http://tfl.nu/9oxv
  Replies (41) Good night (1162) Bad night (7413) Order T-Shirt
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'

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  (647): she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready' http://tfl.nu/8jmk
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.

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  (479): When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls. http://tfl.nu/83jv
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back

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  (847): Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back http://tfl.nu/ffo4
  Replies (6) Good night (1162) Bad night (944) Order T-Shirt
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?

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  (618): Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off. (309): Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay? http://tfl.nu/53dx
  Replies (4) Good night (1124) Bad night (2187)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs

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  (321): I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs http://tfl.nu/bews
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  $100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.

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  (508): $100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me. http://tfl.nu/si9y
  Replies (16) Good night (2380) Bad night (433) Order T-Shirt
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  (305): View more from Florida

  Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Look at your life. Look at your choices.

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  (305): Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up! (216): Look at your life. Look at your choices. http://tfl.nu/vob0
  Replies (7) Good night (1097) Bad night (561)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.

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  (914): Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse. http://tfl.nu/g2u2
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates

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  (717): I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates http://tfl.nu/o8si
  Replies (5) Good night (433) Bad night (999) Order T-Shirt

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