Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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