it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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