youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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