names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
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I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
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I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
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