I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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