Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Randomize