I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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