Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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