Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
smell my finger.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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