he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
