I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
