i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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