how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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