if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
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