I feel great
I just peed on a car
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
