if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I spit up blood this morning
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After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
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He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.