i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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