Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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