Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
