I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
