I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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