i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Randomize