Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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