Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
that's an acceptable place to lick
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
