woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
did i just pee glitter
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
