My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize