id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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