the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
