I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Life is so much better after having sex.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
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