He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
