i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
The power of my boobs compel you
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
