I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
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I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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